My Voyage

This is how I see it. Life is like a voyage. No, you're not completely in control, the currents going to take you where the current's going to take you. You are in control, however, of putting both hands on the wheel, holding on as tight as you can, and steering the way that you want to go. When the sea's rough, you can't give up. You have to try and keep your ship on it's course.

Do You Hear Me?

Yeah, I'm talking to you. You live your day to day life comfortable with the person that you are because it's the only person you've ever been. You're comfortable with the fact that you're sane and that there's nothing wrong with you. Because come on, really? How would you even know?

You won't, until one day you're whole world comes crashing down. Something goes wrong, and suddenly all of the people around you who cared are telling you it's your fault. It's some flaw in YOUR personality. And, looking back, you realize, "Hey, it's kind of true." True, yes, maybe. But can you fix it? If it's the only way you've ever known to be, can you really fix it? What if you can't? I mean, really, if you have some terrible personality flaw and you're constantly hurting the people around you and you CAN'T fix it, what's the point? Of living I mean? Should you just end it right there, spare your "friends" and family the pain of having to continue to live with you as a part of their life? It's certainly a more reasonable solution that packing up and starting over somewhere new. OR, I mean since it's already bad, why not make it worse?

Well, this is what I did. My name is Bryn LaTrain, and this is my story, from the very beginning.

Heroes

"Even heroes need heroes sometimes, and even then strong need someone to tell them, 'It's alright.'" -Ne-Yo

Regret?

You know how a lot of annoying people like to say that they live life with no regrets? Okay, dumb. I believe in not sweating the small stuff, but you're going to make mistakes. BIG mistakes. And when you do, you're going to regret them. For example, changing my major from Early Childhood Education to Math Education.

Why do I regret it? Because I got scared and went with a SAFER degree program instead of sticking with the one that's going to make me happy in the end, even though it's going to be a little riskier along the way. Also, the next math class in the Early Childhood Education sequence is being taught by Dr. Sybilla Beckmann, the author of the textbook. She's amazing at what she does. The class I'm in right now was taught by her textbook, so I already feel like I've been in a class taught by her. She's worked on Sesame Street, and I just would LOVE to take this class. Bad news is, it's only open to Early Childhood Education majors.

Now, I just got back from Aderhold, and filling out a change of major form. I have to wait until that gets processed and then, hopefully, get my butt in to that class. If I can't, this will just be a hard lesson learned, I guess.

My words of wisdom, as cliche as they may be, are: "Do what makes you happy, people. Don't let ANYONE try to convince you that that isn't the 'smart' way to live your life. DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. Find your bliss and follow it."

dearblankpleaseblank.com

This website is pretty funny, considering I'm pretty sure I started this trend among my Facebook friends. You don't have to believe me, but I'm serious. I had a status last year that said: "Dear Falcons, If you could win today, that'd be great. Love, Rachel." LAST YEAR. I had never seen it before. I just thought it and then I Facebooked it. Somebody actually said something to me about it at school the next day. For real. I STARTED IT, PEOPLE. Okay, I'm done now. Oh, except this one cracked me up, because I do this sometimes, but I never thought about it.

"Dear paranoid people who check behind the shower curtain for murderers,
If you do find one, what's your plan?
Sincerely,
Not very well thought out."

Funny stuff. Check it out, show some love:
dearblankpleaseblank.com

Blue Christmas, Schmue Shmistmas

It doesn't work, does it?

Anyways, this is what brings me to blog today, my little gumdrops. I've started making my sweet little playlist for this holiday season! I actually put a lot of thought in to these playlists, it's the soundtrack for my December! This isn't finalized yet, so I'll add, shuffle, and remove until I think it's PERFECT. Keep checking back! Happy Christmachankwanzakah, everyone!

1. Little Saint Nick- The Beach Boys
2. All I Want for Christmas is You- Mariah Carey
3. Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree- Brenda Lee
4. It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year- Andy Williams
5. Blue Christmas- Elvis Presley
6. Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow- Michael Buble
7. Santa Baby- Eartha Kitt
8. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays- *NSYNC
9. Santa Claus is Coming to Town- Jackson 5
10. Mele Kalikimaka- Bing Crosby & the Andrews Sisters
11. It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas- Bing Crosby
12. Sleigh Ride- KT Tunstall
13. Carol of the Bells- Straight No Chaser
14. Jingle Bell Rock- Bobby Helms
15. What Christmas Means to Me- Hanson (Originally by Stevie Wonder. This is BY FAR my favorite Christmas song. I grew up listening to the Hanson version, so I prefer it. I wanted to pay homage to the great Stevie Wonder, though. His version is obviously great, too.)


*Christmas/Sarajevo/12/24- Trans-Siberian Orchestra (BEASTLY)
^ That one is special. If you take one song from this, make it this one.

MY Birds

I've been a Falcons fan for as long as I can remember. I was planning on doing this blog just to say how freaking proud I am of my boys and their 10-2 record. The Atlanta Falcons have always had a talent-packed team, it's nice to finally watch them making something out of it. Right now, they have the best record in the NFC and are, arguably, the best team in the NFL. That's ORIGINALLY what brought me to blog.



The reason I climbed off my dangerously lofted bed to rush to my computer and type as fast as my fingers possibly can fresh off of a Falcons win is just to let you all know that Brent Grimes is Superman. Mr. Grimes, if you ever read this, you're my hero.

Time to get down to business.

"..so you can see what you've been missing." Just kidding, that song's just stuck in my head. Welcome to a semi-productive Sunday. This is my favorite kind! I woke up early and "started the day off right" with my baby and drove his lazy butt 50 feet to his car, which was hilarious. Instead of going back to sleep, which is what I normally do once he leaves for work, I hopped in the shower and headed out to grab breakfast. After that, I went to pick up job applications. Now, I'm back at the dorm, filling out-ish said applications. I also have some homework to do and a Christmas present to work on. ALSO, I have a Falcons game to watch! Yay! So, here's my to-do list for the day, although it's been altered a lot since I made it since I keep coming up with things that I need to do.

Starbucks Application
Trader Joe's
Old Navy
Fix Ipod
Math Homework
FALCONS GAME
Rue 21/Blockbuster/Chuck-e-Cheese/Mall? Probably not.
Wells Fargo crap
Call Gamestop
Take out the Trash
Cleanish?
Christmas Presents!
Make Christmas Playlist!
Get some pizza from Little Caesars!

And the Christmas Countdown Begins!

23 DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!

Can I get an "AMEN!"? I love this time of the year. It really does just put me in an amazing mood. You know what mood specifically? A loving mood, a tender mood, an understanding mood.

Oh
Yeah
Yeah
Candles buring low
Lots of mistletoe
Lots of snow and ice everywhere we go
Choirs singing carols right outside my door
All these things and more
All these things and more

That's what Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love

I see your smiling face like I've never seen before
Though I love you madly it seems I love you more
The little cards you give me will touch my heart for sure
All these things and more
All these things and more

That's what Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love

I feel like running wild
Those angels and a little child
I caught you 'neath the mistletoe
I kiss you once and then some more
I wish you a Merry Christmas baby
I wish you a Merry Chirstmas baby and a happy
Happy New Year
Oh

Let's deck the halls with holly singing Silent Night
Fill the trees with angel's hair and pretty
Pretty lights
Go to sleep and wake up just before daylight
All these things and more
All these things and more

That's what Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me

Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh

Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh

Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh

Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh

Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Christmas means to me my love
Christmas means to me my love

Can I Get a Refill?

I found myself staring at my "Empty" post this morning. I wanted so badly to delete it. I looked up at the title of the blog: "I have a story. Here it is." Everyone has a story. Everyone's story is well worth telling, my story included. I realized that I can't delete that small portion of my story. Instead, I need to move on, refill.

And that's where I am now, pursuing my refill. It's almost the end of the semester, my first semester of college. Today is my last day of Tuesday/Thursday classes. I just attended my last college English class and finished up my portfolio, so I'm done with that for the semester. Later today, I'll go take my Natural Resource Conservation final. After that, I'll be done with that class for the semester as well. My last Political Science breakout section is tomorrow morning. The last lecture for that class is on Monday. I have three days left in my Geometry for Elementary School Teachers class, my last day being next Tuesday. After that, I have my math final on the 10th and my Political Science final on the 15th. And that's all, folks. Done. Finished. Half way to being a sophomore. Sort of. This weekend, I'll get all of the rest of my homework for the semester done and then resume my job hunt. I'm really not getting enough hours at Gamestop, and I need money badly. I also really need to make a trip to Wells Fargo to fix my debit card situation. I'll be staying in Athens this weekend to save gas and get all of that done. I'll probably go home next Tuesday.

Anyways, as I stared blankly at my computer screen in my English class this morning, I realized how much I've learned this semester. I can easily hold a political conversation, make sense, and actually manage to sound intelligent. I actually considered a job working with natural resource conservation just because I never really realized that it was actually a job before, does that make sense? I can now write a DAMN good essay, thank you Mrs. Maher. I also realized that I want to be a math teacher. I've also grown up a lot, fallen in love, made some good new friends, lost a few bad old friends, and changed as a person. I won't say I'm completely in love with who I am and the decisions I've made. I also won't say I have any idea where I'll be in the future, but I'm kind of content with just figuring it out as I go along.

I also just re-read the post about spending the weekend with my baby-love a couple of weeks ago. It made me sad, because I've been so doubtful about the relationship lately. We've definitely had our share of problems. I just really don't want that to overshadow the fact that we've also had our share of amazing moments. I had the best Thanksgiving I've ever had this year, and it was all because of him. I think it's just scary for me to sit back and realize that he really is my EVERYTHING. It's extremely difficult for me to invest so much in to someone that I feel so uncertain about.

So now, I continue to make a conscious effort to refill. I just want to be happy again.